Archive for Boo-hoos
Labor Day weekend, a gory end without option
To rub lemon juice into my wound, the weatherman has informed my glorious city that we are in for an abrupt change in weather. Abrupt meaning SNOW in the mountains. Yes, snow. SNOW in the mountains.
This awful forecast left me wishing I was being offered a choice.  An option perhaps equally as awful, but still, an option to choose my own demise.  Such as: would you [...]
Three flats and a Tasmanian Devil
Shopping with my son is always a circus because my Little Man is never content unless he can climb the walls and skydive off the scaffolding, or blow something up, or worse, eat a piece of regurgitated bubble gum off the floor.
With that said, it is no doubt I was pleased to find a stroller he loves to [...]
Tomorrow at this time it will be the 1st of August
Summer is running away from us.  I can barely breathe.  I think the oxygen supply is running out.  The earth is starting to rotate back out into the galaxy, further away from the sun, making our days shorten. Soon there will be a change in the season. I might completely fall apart, or simply combust.
there are not many more days to sail,
or [...]
Horses and watermelon
You wanna know what frustrates me?  SEEDLESS WATERMELON. It’s frustrating as Hell. If Hell is a frustrating place, and I have been told it is, then seedless watermelon is FRUSTRATING AS HELL! I don’t think seedless watermelon should be called seedless, it should be called colorless seeded watermelon.  Or is that not politically correct? Never mind the politics I am in no mood to involve [...]
The birds
I took my children to feed the ducks the other day, or so I thought.Â
Oh look, those cute ducks spotted our bread crumbs!
Why does that little duck look alarmed?
What the crap are those?
RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!
EVERYONE GET IN THE CAR!Â
THEY ARE COMING FOR US!!
And then we drove to the hospital to be tested for bird [...]
Reasons a vacation would be good for me
Sitting in front of my computer I desperately tried to spell the word OF. After sounding it out I began to type A and then V.
I keep referring to my pedometer as a pacemaker.
I feel tired and cold. Just kidding. I stole that from the Thompson Twins.
Each visit to the grocery store I purchase more [...]
On the Pot(ty)
I may as well tell you, I’m human, and do use a potty or toilet when nature calls. I have been potty trained for more than 30 years. Since becoming a mother my visits to the little girl’s room have never been swift or carefree.
Everything falls apart when I’m on the pot. [...]
Prayer
While I was in line at the grocery store I overheard an elderly mother and her 50-something daughter arguing whether or not Queen Latifah was a character played by Eddie Murphy. Aside from the pure hilariousness of that claim their conversation was extremely deflating because once I realized it was the daughter who made [...]
Not enough soapsuds in the world.
Little Man eagerly ran over to me this morning to show what appeared to be a little black wad of thread cradled in his chubby cherub-like hands. BUT IT WASN’T A THREAD, it was a DEAD FLY! As I grabbed his little hand and broke out in heebie geebie chills the fly bounced [...]
My masthead ran away
Bare with me people as I wander aimlessly through Wordpress to figure out why my new masthead and new additions to this site have gone missing.
They honestly just jumped up and ran out of here without any notice. If I could find them I would fire them on the spot.
Oddly, some Mac [...]
